This Is Who We Are

We enjoyed a dinner of toasted tuna rolls and leftover side dishes from earlier in the week as the cool air from the lake whispered through the trees. It had been a very good day spent frolicking on the lake. Somebody suggested that we see if we can find the movie, On Golden Pond, that maybe it would be the perfect movie to watch after such a day. After dinner I took a shower, wondering how the old classic from 1982 would hold up after all these years. When I walked into the living room all fresh and clean shaven, Pam and Paula were huddled over their cell phones while the television screen in the corner screamed the headline about an assassination attempt on Former President Donald Trump. 

I watched the video, heard the sound of firecrackers and saw him reach for his ear then drop down behind the lectern. I watched the Secret Service storm the stage, eventually lift the man up, whisking him away to a black SUV. I saw him clinch his fist and yell at the crowd, “Fight! Fight! Fight!”

And just like that…this national moment of chaos and despair just got immeasurably worse.

The photograph of Trump, face bloodied by a would-be assassin’s bullet, fist raised in defiance and anger, will become an icon. I am left with a profound sadness and memories of my parents. As a five year old child one of my very first memories of any kind was the ashen-faced reaction of Mom and Dad the day John F. Kennedy was killed. Then, almost twenty years later, I walked in the house and saw my father standing alone in front of our old black and white RCA Victor watching a breaking news report about Ronald Reagan being shot and whisked off to surgery at a nearby hospital. My dad had tears in his eyes. One a Democrat, the other a Republican, but both Presidents. Dad made a point to me about respecting the office over the man. I have never forgotten the scene, my Dad never having been much of a cryer.

We eventually settled down from all the news and watched the movie. It was transcendently beautiful. From the very first scene to watching the credits roll over the shimmering water, I was on the edge of remarkable emotion. Henry Fonda. Katherine Hepburn. A story about aging and family and a magical place that brings them together. It was a lot to process at the end of such a day.

Then, I was awakened by the morning sun filtering through the blinds. I glanced at the bedside clock…5:22. I got up, threw some clothes on and walked down to the lake. The sun had just risen…

I am at the point in my life where the sight of any politician on my tv screen makes me almost physically ill, none more so than Donald Trump. I have made my views on this man abundantly clear in this space over the past eight years. But, he was our President and very well may be again. Like my father before me, I respect the office he held, and hate seeing it diminished by violence. The only thing that feels different now is that nobody is shocked by this. Deep down, most people in America who have been paying attention expected this. I know I did. I wasn’t sure which one of them would get shot at, but I was sure one of them would before Election Day. The painful truth of the moment is—this is who we are now.

But, as Ernest Hemingway reminded us…the sun also rises. Today is a new day and the possibilities are endless. As I stood on the dock watching the sun peaking over the pines I said a prayer for my country.