Monday, February 1, 2021

Ahh, February

February has arrived, the Universe’s answer to the question, Is is possible for things to get worse? I have written often in this space of my feelings about February and will not badger the reader with anything further on the subject except to say that the 2021 version has the potential for all time status. What follows are just a few of the agenda items on tap this month:

- An impeachment trial of an ex-president, whereby the ancient cows of the Senate, though overwhelmed with other pressing business, prove that they can walk and chew cud at the same time.

- The continuing David v Goliath investment saga of the short sale where David is a band of basement dwelling keyboard warriors and Goliath is a pack of billionaire hedge fund managers. One can always hope that both sides end up spectacularly dead-broke.

- The slow roll out of the Great Vaccination, with the usual suspects gumming up the works with bureaucratic bumbling, and the other usual suspects making fools of themselves protesting the government’s evil plot to alter our DNA and sap our animal spirits...or some such thing. I can hardly keep up anymore.

- A Super Bowl played in a cavernous, mostly empty stadium featuring, once again, Tom Brady playing quarterback. No matter the outcome of the game, Brady is the winner, 43 and still at the top of a profession dominated by young men.

- Valentine’s Day, always a challenge even for the most amorous of couples, will be made far more difficult this year due to the fact that after ten months of lockdowns, quarantines, and isolation, veteran couples have long past exhausted every possible topic of conversation. “ Hey, Honey. How about we have a nice private dinner, just the two of us?”...sounds like the romance edition of Groundhog Day.

- Four more Sundays of sofa-church, where we get to stare blankly at our computer screens watching musicians sing, and preachers preach, trying to remember to close our eyes when somebody is praying, all while wearing pajamas and sporting bed head hair.

Can’t wait.

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