An observation…and some really bad jokes.

Today is packing day. Its also the day where a thousand last minute details need to be taken care of. Leaving your house for 5 weeks isn’t as easy as we make it look! So, as my dear mother used to say, we’ll be running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off. By the way…this was no abstract colloquialism to my mother, who as a ten year old was tasked with actually cutting the head off a chicken to start preparing it for dinner. After the hatchet came down, the unfortunate bird ran around the barnyard for several minutes before succumbing to its fate, making a lasting impression on my mom. But instead of years of psycho-analysis, mom just moved on, got married and raised four kids. It was a different world.

Since this will be my last blogpost for a few days while we travel to Maine and get settled once there, I need to make it memorable. The jokes I have chosen for the occasion were carefully selected for their cringe-worthiness. I left no stone unturned to uncover these beauties:

Where does a coffee maker go when it dies?

Percolatory…

Went to a restaurant with my parents and they were arguing about whether ordering the fries or salad were better to go with the meal so they asked me my opinion.

I said, "Oh, no. I'm not picking sides"

I work in a factory that makes clown shoes.

It’s no small feet…

Last night I experimented cooking some Ribeyes with cannabis oil.

Not gonna lie, the steaks were pretty high…

One last thing, I’m running a little low on toll money so you guys need to click on a few ads here so I don’t get stranded in Connecticut on the side of the interstate with a tin cup!!

One more last thing. Killed squirrels number 20 and 21 of the year yesterday…an all-time record before July 1st!!