Me: I regret to inform you all that April Fool’s Day has been cancelled at our office this year.
As most of you know, AFD is the greatest day of the year on my calendar. It has been the occasion of some of the most epic pranks ever attempted. I have terrorized all of them over the years, resulting in a wave of anxiety filling the office in the days leading up to April 1st. I would hear empty threats from some of them, “Doug, I swear you better leave me alone this year. I am not in the mood for your foolishness!!...or this classic, “I suppose its too much to ask that you grow the heck up!!” Still, the pranks kept coming, from the classic clove of garlic implanted in the mouthpiece of Blaire’s phone, to the cabinet and refrigerator filled with orange ping pong balls. But, with the events of 2021, I thought it best to give the Tomfoolery a hard pass. Besides, nobody will be in the office anyway. Thanks, COVID!!
Of course, my announcement provoked a couple of responses from two of my preferred victims:
Response number one: That’s the best news I’ve heard in weeks!!!
Response number two: Amen to that!!
One of those responses came from a hospital bed!
I felt the need to offer this caveat...
“It should however be noted that—as we all know—AFD pranks are cumulative, which is to say that ones not pulled off in year A roll over to year B, making year B twice as awesome as it would otherwise be. It’s just as well, the remote controlled WUHAN bats I ordered haven’t arrived yet.”
Response number 3: I thought all of us testing positive for COVID was the April Fool’s joke...
Indeed...sigh...
No comments:
Post a Comment