Tuesday, April 12, 2022

A Night in the Life

My new “get better sleep routine”.

7:30 pm. Bring up Nationals game on MLB app. Bemoan lack of clutch hitting.

7:45 pm. Start searching archives for terrible Dad Jokes to send to long suffering friends and colleagues.

8:30 pm. Work on latest chapter of novel.

9:30 pm. Take 10 mg Melatonin pill

9:30 pm. Continue writing.

10:00 pm. Escort Lucy outside for famous Last Pee perambulation.

10:02 pm. Encourage Lucy to consider doing her business at some point soon.

10:04 pm. “While we’re young, Lucy…while we’re young!”

10:15 pm. Instruct Alexa to “Turn out the den lights.” Freak Lucy out!

10:25 pm. Perform nightly hygiene routine.

10:30 pm. Climb into bed. Ten minutes later, sound asleep.

3:50 am. Eyes pop open. Glance at clock. Heavy sigh. Nearly break neck tripping over Lucy in route to the bathroom.

4:00 am. Get back into bed, followed closely by Lucy who now wants to sleep where my feet are supposed to be.

4:15 am. Tossing and turning while listening to Pam enjoying the deep sleep of the just.

4:20 am.  Give up on sleep and head downstairs to empty dishwasher, make coffee and write this stupid blog.




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