Strong Women

I don’t remember the year and I can’t recall exactly what class it was, but I do remember one day back in college, I found myself in the midst of a spirited discussion about women in politics—in particular whether there would ever be a woman President of the United States. This was in the late 1970’s, at a time when there were far fewer women in any branch of the government than there are today. The consensus seemed to be that no, no woman would ever be President of these United States. Once this consensus was reached several people, all males, sought to explain the reasons why this was true, and I heard lots of comments about the fairer sex, even suggestions that women did not possess the necessary temperament to lead a nation. Being over 40 years ago, many of the things that were said in this discussion seemed rather mild and even mainstream. Back then, as now, I was a fairly conservative guy, but I remember distinctly being confused by the notion that women were somehow unfit by temperament to be President, so much so that I offered a vigorous objection in the form of a question—“What the hell is wrong with you people??”

Before anyone fits me for a halo, there is a simple explanation for my reaction to this conversation from 40 years ago. It’s not that I was then, am now, or ever have been a feminist. My views on this topic were simply a result of my life experiences. When you grew up in a household run by Betty Dunnevant, and populated with sisters like Paula Roop and Linda Schwartz, you are quickly disabused of the notion that women lack the necessary temperament to do anything. On the contrary, I was convinced that my mother could do literally anything she set her mind to. Although Mom never attended college, she was smart, quick-witted, and extraordinarily well read. To say that she was strong-willed or opinionated would be the understatement of the century. Then, there were my sisters, Linda the nurse who basically raised me the three years we lived in New Orleans while Mom and Dad worked and went to class. Linda—the woman who served as a nurse to expectant mothers in the charming neighborhood of Creighton Court in Richmond’s east end. Fearless is the word that comes to mind. Then there was Paula, my younger sister, who has managed to excel at every job she has had in education for 45 years, despite working under the tutelage of countless incompetent bosses, male and female. But, it gets even worse.

I married a woman who is smart, equipped with a perfectionist’s devotion to excellence, and the type of organizational skill set that would be the envy of any executive suite in the country. You give Pam enough Google Docs and she could split the atom. 

Then there’s my executive assistant, Kristin Reihl, a woman so headstrong and opinionated, half the time I feel like her employee.

Now, I watch my daughter killing it teaching 7th grade English, blowing the doors off anything she is asked to do. I notice that my son married yet another strong, confident, and incredibly capable woman. After a while it occurs to you that all of your life you have been surrounded by strong women, some by birth, but many others by choice. So, when you hear people spouting nonsense about women not being tough enough, strong enough or possessing the right temperament, you just shake your head and think, “What a bunch of morons! If my Mom was still alive, she would wipe the floor up with you!”