Sunday, November 11, 2018

A Question of Intent

Yesterday, I wrote a blog about gun control. Afterwards, I sent the link to a buddy of mine who lives up in Maine. He has forgotten more about guns than I will ever know. I wanted his thoughts, figuring that he might have insights which I hadn’t thought of. Imagine that?...seeking out opinions of those who might disagree with you!! It works so well for Alan and me...why can’t Washington figure it out?

Anyway, he did bring up things that hadn’t crossed my mind, like what effect these laws would have on private gun transactions, etc..I learned some things. But, in the back and forth, he made some observations that I would like to address in a more expansive way than texting will allow. Besides, my thumbs are far too fat and clumsy!!

I will paraphrase Alan’s observations here, hoping to be as accurate as possible:

Why is it that we are so determined to stop “senseless deaths” when it comes to guns and yet there are far more deadly killers out there that we hardly bat an eye at...cars kill 30,000 a year. Why are we not seeking to limit how fast our cars can travel? How about alcohol, another legal product that people misuse...kills more people, destroys more families than guns could even think about. We accept this slow destruction of life with barely a whimper. There are no restrictions on how much alcohol one can buy. Why are we suddenly so intent on controlling the tool of evil(guns), when guns have been around forever? What’s different now?

Ok, there’s a lot here. First, I do think it possible to be grieved about more than one thing at a time. As Americans in 2018, we all have learned how to multi-task our outrage. But, he makes a good point in that the media doesn’t broadcast 24/7 everytime there’s a twenty car pileup on 95. Drunk driving deaths hardly get more than 30 seconds on the nightly news. Accordingly, there doesn’t seem to be equal outrage over these “senseless deaths.” So, to try to answer his What’s different now question, let me offer this.

I feel that the difference here is a matter of intent and the nature of the victims. When a guy is speeding and goes into a slide and wipes out three kids at a school bus stop, it is an unspeakable tragedy. The driver will spend a considerable part of the remainder of his life in prison for vehicular manslaughter. However, nobody will accuse him of intentionally murdering school kids. He didn’t leave the house that morning with this outcome in mind. He mishandled his car which, at 2000 pounds, was converted into a deadly weapon. This type of tragedy takes on a much darker quality if it were learned that he intended to murder those kids, that the accident was no accident at all. Intent is a game changer to how we perceive the tragedy. The same is true with regards to alcohol related deaths. Drunk driving has, in fact, been stigmatized today in a way that it wasn’t in the past...think how a song like Frank Sinatra’s One For My Baby and One More For The Road would go over today! But generally speaking, when a drunk driver kills an innocent family on the highway, the drunk driver is shunned and the dead family is grieved, but it still doesn’t carry the same stench of deliberate intent. Yes, alcoholism destroys families. A legal product, misused, can have devastating consequences. But, what rational person would place an alcoholic in the same moral category as a mass murderer?

While it is true that without guns, evil, disturbed human beings will find other means to kill. They might build bombs, wield knives, throw rocks. But, all of these other tools take either greater skill to assemble, or yield a much lower kill rate. If the guy who killed those people in that synagogue was armed with only a knife I dont think 13 worshippers would have perished.

But, there’s something else here. There is something instrinsically evil about the ease with which a mad man can kill. An automatic or semi automatic weapon is designed to kill as may things as rapidly as possible, and it is my contention that we as a society make it far to easy for that mad man to get his hands on these types of weapons. One more thing, and this might just be me...

When I see news of a huge accident on a highway that kills lots of innocent people, it is heartbreaking. When I learn of a drunk driver killing a family of four, it is tragic. But, when as an American, I am constantly hearing of crazy people walking into public places and opening fire, I feel that there is a sickness at the core of my country. I wonder, why does this happen in America so often, when no other advanced nation on earth has to deal with this? When someone opens fire in a bar in most other western nations, it’s stop the presses breaking news. Here, it’s Tuesday. This is the thing that makes mass shooting deaths different for me. It’s the question of societal health. Everytime it happens, I feel as though the social fabric that holds us together is getting ripped...yet again. At some point it will come completely apart. I never feel this way about drunk drivers and traffic deaths. I just don’t.

So, that’s my attempt at an answer for my friend.

Saturday, November 10, 2018

My Gun Control Proposal

In the eight year history of this blog, the subject of mass shootings and gun control has come up what seems like 100 times. It’s interesting to see how my reactions to each subsequent incident have changed and how they have stayed the same. Running through the commentary is a dark stream of helplessness, a heaviness of heart. 

Yesterday I made a simple observation on Facebook about how frequent these shootings have become. As is always the case, that remark invited a back and forth debate about gun control, not my intent. Instead of examining the condition of our collective hearts, we prefer pedantic discussions about the 2nd Amendment, discussions that quickly send us scurrying into our separate ideological bunkers.

Here’s what I’m left with...I live in the only first world country in the world that has to deal with this level of gun violence. Nobody else is even close. Further, the violence is getting worse, not better. The current pace of these atrocities suggests that we will experience five or six more before Christmas. Think about that for a minute. It should disturb the hell out of us. 

I am not a gun expert. I have no political instincts, little knowledge of the Rube-Goldberg process required to get anything done. But, I have this blog, and a reasonably well functioning brain, and with that brain I have thought a lot about this topic. What follows is my gun control proposal. I am fully aware that, even if implemented, this proposal will not put an immediate end to this plague. Perhaps it would get worse before it gets better. However, I do think that over time, it will help reverse the trend lines. To some, it will appear too timid, others might accuse me of being a closet radical. Here goes...

My proposal has three parts:

1. Require a waiting period for the purchase of any firearm. The length of this waiting period is negotiable. I prefer a week, but would be open to other suggestions.  This will have the effect of reducing crimes of passion, since nothing as deadly serious as purchasing a gun should be allowed to be done either on a whim or during a time of roiled emotions.

2. Nationwide, mandatory, and complete background checks should be mandated for any firearm purchase. Current background checks are not thorough enough, not widespread enough, and not always completed. Changes to privacy laws for mental health records will have to be considered, since so many of these killers have mental health issues, that if shared in a background check would deny their access to guns. For anyone who might object to this as an intrusion on their rights, I should point out that no one can merely waltz into a DMV and walk out with a driver’s license. You’ve got to take a test, provide proper identification, etc..In my profession, I am constantly required to provide full financial documentation and demonstrate proficiency to maintain my license to practice my profession.

3. The sale of all automatic and semi-automatic weapons would be banned. I have many friends who are avid hunters. My Dad loved to hunt. I have never met a single person who uses an AK-47 to kill a deer. I can imagine no reason why any ordinary citizen of this republic would need an automatic weapon. Let me here address an argument  I hear frequently when this subject comes up. It goes something like this...Doug, the American people need automatic weapons because without them, we would be defenseless if ever our government turned on us. This is what the Founders had in mind when they crafted the 2nd Amendment. All the despots of the 20th century all confiscated the guns from the people so they would have a monopoly on deadly violence. We can’t let that happen here.
Ok, I have a grain of sympathy for this view, since I am very much a liberty-loving patriot. However, the practicality of this position disappeared probably 50 years ago. Have you actually looked at our military firepower lately? Everywhere you look, even in some local governments, you see SWAT teams decked out with armor-piercing bullets, body armor, even armored personnel carriers. Navy Seals, black ops, and other special forces of our military are awesomely endowed with cutting edge killing technology. Are you seriously tying to suggest that owning a semi-automatic rifle will allow you to defend yourself against such a force? When everyone from soldiers to farmers were armed with the same muzzle loaded long rifles, this was a much more powerful argument, and THAT was the argument the Framers were making with the 2nd Amendment. Today, it seems a silly one to insist on making.

So, what about the 300 million legally purchased firearms already in American homes? The constitutionality and practically of confiscating that much firepower is ridiculous. Yes, I know that Australia has attempted confiscation with some success, but they did so without the restraints of their Constitution, and even so, passed a sweeping law, fully debated in their congress to get it done. I believe that confiscation would not work here, and would violate the constitution. It’s like saying that we should round up 15 million illegal immigrants and send them back where they came from. First of all, impossible to do, and secondly, wildly Un-American.

So, even with these three changes, we would still be a well armed nation with at least one gun for every man, woman and child in these United States. Additionally, these changes would not provide an immediate fix to this epidemic of gun-wielding, mentally ill killers acting out their hateful fantasies. But, it would be a step in the right direction. It would demonstrate that we are not powerless, that we can agree to at least try to forge a path towards less violence. It does so while preserving the 2nd Amendment, but it does ask us as citizens to put up with a little inconvenience in order to make it more difficult for a mad man to get his hands on an instrument of death.

Discuss...



Thursday, November 8, 2018

The Elephant Man

Luckily, I have no client meetings today. The only people who will have to look at me are my wife, who kind of has to, the guys and girls at the office, who will find it all very entertaining, and my assistant, who will be highly compensated for her trouble. You see, last night, at exactly 7:13—I was checking on the oven timer at the time—I felt a familiar pressure and heaviness in the corner of my left eye. I thought...Oh, crap.

Yes friends, once again I have been visited by what for me has become a hardy perennial...periorbital edema...or, if you prefer the Latin... hideously disgusting swollen eye. I will spare all of you a selfie.

What follows are the first responses I can expect from my buddies at work...and remember, these are my friends:

Holy s**t, what the heck happened to your eye??!!

Pam finally had enough of your smart mouth, huh?

I don’t know, I think it’s an improvement.

Then, my assistant will walk in, take one look and burst out laughing. She is not known for either grace or empathy where I am concerned. She’s more in the Oh, stop being a baby! school of nursing, which features a lot of pointing and laughing. Sometimes I think I could keel over in front of her, grasping my chest and she would say, O for heavens sake! Could you have at least signed these checks first? Honestly!!

When I woke up this morning, I knew instantly that it had gotten far worse during the night. No mirror was required, I just knew. The eye was heavy and I could barely see through the narrow slit that remained. When I finally steeled myself for a look, my instincts were validated. Holy Cow. After popping two Benadryl—the only known, sometimes effective cure—I looked again in the mirror. Ladies and gentlemen, I am here to tell you that no matter how attractive you think you are, and some of you are very attractive, one case of edema has the power to turn you into the Elephant Man.

So, this guy will be sporting a pair of thick, black shades today, indoors and out.

What a freak show!

Wednesday, November 7, 2018

“Always Believe The Poodle”

Now that the 2018 midterms are in the can, it’s time to turn our attention to the Presidential election of 2020. To that end, my daughter and I had the following conversation yesterday...

    


Kaitlin: Jackson and I had a long talk today about the importance of civic responsibility. You can tell, especially in the last photo, that it really sank in.

Me: Yeah...in that last picture it’s like he is considering the possibility that candidate “A” might outlaw snoozles.

Kaitlin: Jackson is considering running for office on an anti-firework platform in 2020.

Me: Anti-firework and a statewide ban on trash trucks...plus, free skratches for everyone, even bad boys.

Kaitlin: Sounds awfully liberal to me! Even bad boys??

Me: I’ve always suspected that Jackson is a socialist pupper...From each according to their ability to skratch, To each according to their need of a snoozle. And he’s probably in favor of open border collies.

Kaitlin: I’ve consulted with Jackson, and he has informed me that although he wants free cookie bones for all, he is unwilling to share any of his cookie bones with anyone. He also stated his refusal to share any of his stuffed frens with any other doggos. I’m concerned that this kind of waffling does not bode well for his campaign.

Me: Typical Limousine Liberal. Sounds like he harbors some 1%er ideas...now that he has his cookie bones, he wants to pull up the ladder behind him!

Kaitlin: we need to drain the swamp!

Me: Isn’t it also true that Jackson has promised not to accept any campaign cookie bone contributions from any outside lobby groups?

Kaitlin: I can neither confirm or deny that such cookie bones have been consumed.

Me: Can you confirm or deny the rumor that Jackson has steadfastly refused to debate any cat candidates who might be on the ballot?

Kaitlin: Confirmed. He drew a hard line on that one.

Me: And, what about that #METOO accusation lodged against him by the French Poodle down the street?

Kaitlin: I 100% believe the poodle....although, he’ll probably get elected anyway.



Me: As Jackson’s running mate, Lucy would like to say that she is in favor of a universal guaranteed income for all puppers so that everyone will able to enjoy unlimited snoozles.

Kaitlin: As you can see, Jackson is fully on board with this proposal...


Me: Ok then, all we need is a campaign slogan...

JACKSON/LUCY 2020...after Trump, retrieving the best of what’s left!


















Sunday, November 4, 2018

Words To Live By

The New King James version of the Bible translates Proverbs 14:12 this way...

There is a way which seems right unto a man, but the end thereof leads to death.

The New English Married Couples translation puts it this way...

There is a way which seems right unto a man, but then he runs it by his wife and she says, “What, are you nuts?”


Saturday, November 3, 2018

My Election Prediction

No matter where you happen to live in these United States, you have not been able to escape the deluge of political propaganda over the last couple of months. Television ads, radio spots, Facebook videos, and a mailbox stuffed with slickly produced broadsides, all proclaiming this election to be the single most critically important election in the history of our country. In just a few days now, it will all go away. The question of the day is...Will the Democrats take the House, the Senate, or both? Or will the Republicans hold on to one or both? Here’s my prediction:

When we wake up on Wednesday morning, the 7th of November, no matter the outcome, the world will stubbornly, relentlessly refuse to end. When the new Congress convenes in January, whichever side lost will be proven wrong in their overblown rhetoric about the end of days. The side that won will be unable to deliver on any of their arrogant promises. In response to their failures, a new excuse will be made, a new villain identified, which will require lots of fund raising to defeat. Then, when 2020 rolls around, every media outlet on our planet will declare that election to be the the single most critically important election in the history of the country. 

I have made this prediction about election outcomes several times in my life. I have never been wrong.

Friday, November 2, 2018

...Making Us Into Devils

I am currently making my way through Mere Christianity for probably the sixth time. It has always been something of an obsession. I find it at once reassuring and sustaining of my faith, while also convicting of my shortcomings. This time through I was struck by this particular passage from the chapter entitled...Forgiveness. C. S. Lewis’ words about what happens to the human heart when forgiveness is abandoned reads like it was written yesterday, describing as it does the polarizing divisions all around us...

Suppose one reads a story of filthy astrocities in the paper. Then suppose that something turns up suggesting that the story might not be quite true, or not quite so bad as it was made out. Is one’s first feeling, “Thank God, even they aren’t quite so bad as that,” or is it a feeling of disappointment, and even a determination to cling to the first story for the sheer pleasure of thinking your enemies as bad as possible? If it is the second then it is, I am afraid, the first step in a process which, if followed to the end, will make us into devils. You see, one is beginning to wish that black was a little blacker. If we give that wish its head, later on we shall wish to see grey as black, and then to see white itself as black. Finally, we shall insist on seeing everything—God and our friends and ourselves included— as bad, and not be able to stop doing it: we shall be fixed forever in a universe of pure hatred.