Saturday afternoon Pam and I sat down with my
daughter and her fiancée for our first official wedding planning meeting. So
far, our wedding planning has consisted of picking out the venue and forking
over a couple of deposits. Kaitlin has been overwhelmed with her first month of
teaching, so Pam has spent all day and all night doing research on the internet. Saturday it was time to discover what she
had learned. Thanks to the government shutdown, Jon has been furloughed, so he was
available. There we all were sitting in our den, captivated by the Apple TV
presentation on the big screen, blown away by the otherworldly organization
skills of my wife.
There before us, in all of its 52 inch HD brilliance,
was an Excel spreadsheet with each line item of our wedding budget. I use that word very carefully
since in reality the dollar signs on the screen represent our fervent hopes and
dreams and as actual hard and fast numbers, serve as mere suggestions. The
term, “in the ball park” frequently comes up in our conversation along with, “more
or less” and “roughly”.
After the first hour we have chosen a DJ for the
blessed event and in so doing saved several hundred dollars from what was
budgeted. This decision was not made without much angst and trepidation, since
hiring the wrong DJ could be disastrous. (Picture 200 mostly white, mostly middle class, mostly
religious people trying to wrap their heads around the lyrics to Niggas in Paris!). Luckily for us, Pam’s
brilliant research was flashed up on the screen complete with pro’s and con’s,
copies of text conversations with Patrick with his observations, as well as
user reviews of our guy with Dynamite DJ’s. She even threw in audio clips of
some suggested aisle walking music. I’m told that when Wagner’s bridal march
was played, both Jon and Kaitlin got teary-eyed. I didn’t notice because I
couldn’t stop staring at the minimized spreadsheet with our budget up in the
corner of the screen. Were we seriously going to have to pay for chair rental for every fanny over 150 at
the reception? Are you kidding me? Not only do I have to feed these people, I
have to provide chairs for them to sit in? Whatever happened to mingling?
At the two and a half hour mark, we had managed to
check several items off of our to-do
list, and schedule a tasting party at our venue for next Wednesday. This is
where we get to sample the different types of dishes that can possibly be served
at the reception, everything from vichyssoise to corn dogs, I’m told. I am
assuming that this “tasting” is complimentary, but as of yet, no word on
whether chairs will be provided.
There will be many more of these wedding planning
meetings to come over the next several months, I’m sure. There will be
surprises, little unplanned detours down the road of our master plan, like this
morning when we discovered that the amount we had budgeted for a photographer
might only cover two rolls of film, one tripod and four pictures of the wedding
cake. Apparently, capturing images of this event for posterity will cost me
more than I paid for my first automobile.
I will keep all of you posted on the thrilling
details to come as we take this matrimonial journey together.
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