Dodging Bullets

Winston Churchill once said, “Nothing in life is so exhilarating as to be shot at with no result.” Less famous and far less celebrated people refer to barely avoiding something disastrous as, “dodging a bullet.”  This morning Pam and I had an experience which combined dodging a bullet and having your dreams crushed simultaneously. Put another way…this morning’s inspection didn’t go well.

The events leading up to the inspection had been tumultuous. We discovered the deleterious effects of a little known regulatory change implemented in April of 2022 that made the purchase of second homes far more costly and difficult, which featured among other things exorbitant points and higher interest rates. The purpose of this regulation was to discourage the purchase of second and third homes by people who already have homes in favor of those who have yet to buy their first. It was also enacted because of a home shortage in the land and to prevent the rich getting richer in the real estate market. Which is all very well and good except for two salient points. One, what first time home buyer will be buying a lake house in Maine as their first home? And two, this regulation—as thousands of other regulations in the past have—misses its target by a country mile. The real rich pay cash for their second and third homes!! But, I digress.

This unpleasant discovery caused lots of soul searching on our part but we finally crunched the numbers again for the 89th time and made peace with this new reality. The last hurdle to clear was this morning’s inspection. Todd greeted us stiffly at the door and proceeded to go about his job with diligence and an eye for detail. I would learn later what I suspected at the onset…Todd was ex-military. As we followed him around the exterior of the house we kept hearing him use phrasing like  that’s a cost cutting move, and I wouldn’t have done it this way, and that won’t do. After nearly an hour of this he kindly took Pam aside and suggested that if we decided at any time that we had seen enough he would cancel the rest of the inspection and only charge us for his time. This is known in the inspection trade as a fire engine red warning flag!! Tiffany turned to us at this point and made our decision far easier with this blunt assessment, “I’m sorry but I just can’t let you buy this house. It will be a money pit.”

So this two week white knuckle thrill ride is over. We have dodged a bullet. We are also very disappointed. In many ways we had already taken possession of the place in our hearts. But so many red flags had crept up over the past several days we both knew that there was a chance it wouldn’t work. When that worry becomes reality its hard to take.

But take it we will. Its not the end of the world. We will be back in six weeks for our fall trip, and as long as On The Water In Maine stays in business we will continue to rent every summer and fall for as far as the eye can see. Maybe something else will pop up when we least expect.