“I think I fear success more than failure,” he said
absently, sitting at a conference table with his business partner.
“What?” his business partner asked, looking up from a
pile of bills spread out in front of him. “What’s so scary about success?”
“Success can change a person, totally change their
life.”
“That’s right, Einstein. Success can transform a
starving, hopeless and disgusting business failure into a rich, well-fed entrepreneur
practically overnight. Man, you beat everything…worrying about impending
success while everyone else, including me is busy worrying about bankruptcy.”
“No, I’m serious. Have you ever thought about what you
would do if you won the lottery, say 20 million or so?”
“The first thing I would do is buy you out so I wouldn’t
have to have these idiotic conversations.”
“I mean after you paid your house off, cleared up the
business debt, then maybe bought a vacation home somewhere, couple of new cars,
new golf clubs and all, you would still have millions left over.”
“Yeah, I can definitely see how that would suck.”
“Then the trouble would start. Everyone you ever knew
back in high school and college, all of your distant relatives would start
hitting you up for money. If you turned them down they would end up hating you
for it. Then, the do-gooders would come calling…the Red Cross, March of Dimes,
the preacher, they would all come out of the woodwork and unless you gave them
money, they would end up hating you too.”
“And then you would take comfort in that new car smell
as you drive to your vacation home with your new golf clubs in the trunk. It’s like
the circle of life. All of your old friends from the poor old days would get
replaced with shiny new ones.”
“You know what the worst part about too much money,
too fast?”
“Oh, I don’t know…if you spend it less than an hour
after you get it you get cramps?”
“The worst part is that everything would be finished.
You would be done. No more reason to care about things, nothing more to worry
about, nothing to get you out of bed in the morning.”
“Dude, you are so weird.”
“Listen, right now the business is doing ok but we
still struggle month to month, right?”
“Yes. Which is something that I’m counting on your 20
million dollar lottery windfall to fix.”
“No, don’t you see? We’re just like everyone else! We
have common cause with our fellow man. We’re all in the same boat, we’re all
struggling to make a go of it. If I win 20 million, I’m out of the club and I can
never be like everyone else ever again.”
“That club you’re talking about? It’s called the
sucker’s club and yes, 20 million gets you kicked out. But then you get kicked up
into the millionaires club, which has way better food. That’s the American
Dream my friend…the American Dream.”
“I guess so…”
“That’s right partner…the American Dream. So, get your
upwardly mobile ass up and get me a Dr. Pepper out of the fridge while I figure
out a way to balance our checkbook.”
He walked into the kitchen and brought a cold can back
to the conference room. It made a sharp metallic sound as he sat it in the
glass table top. He went to the window and stared down at the air conditioner unit
with its big fan blades turning slowly. After a few minutes he walked back to
his office.
“Maybe we should buy
a lottery ticket,” he said as he disappeared down the hall.
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