Fashion Trends That Confuse Me

 Back in the 1990’s a new fashion trend emerged among young males which featured the wearing of pants sagged low around the behind, revealing one’s underwear of choice. To many of us this seemed preposterous, not to mention diabolically uncomfortable. Largely this particular trend has run its course, although you still see it occasionally. 

But then a couple days ago I ran across a photo of singer Billie Eilish giving her acceptance speech at the Grammy’s. The reason the photograph was so widespread was because of her now infamous “you can’t be illegal on stolen land” line. But that’s not what drew me to the picture. No, what I noticed was something I haven’t seen before. Ms. Eilish seemed to be wearing three belts—for no apparent reason whatsoever, since none of the three were secured to anything. They just were hanging there, flapping this way and that untethered from any conceivable function. I can only assume they were there for mere decoration . Maybe they were intending to make some sort of statement—that she had been freed from the shackles of the patriarchy? 

Maybe this is a one-off, it won’t become the female version of the sagging pants thing for young men in the 90’s. Or maybe this will become all the rage among the cool kids? Time will tell.

Bad Bunny and Me

 As a man of a certain age, I am quite aware that mine is not the preferred demographic of institutions like the NFL, or anything else for that matter, except pharmaceutical companies hawking cures for unheard of ailments. I am also keenly aware of the fact that much of popular culture has passed me by. It is a natural progression for older generations to lose contact with every new thing that comes along. I have bigger fish to fry than being in the know on the latest sensation of the moment. So several months ago when the National Football League announced that this year’s Super Bowl halftime show would be in the hands of Bad Bunny, I had no reaction whatsoever. I had never heard of him.

One of my young friends texted me yesterday about something he saw on the recent Grammy’s awards show. Since I hadn’t watched it I Googled the highlights. Lots of political speeches and awareness pins, that sort of thing. There was Bad Bunny winning a bunch of awards. Then the next day Roger Goodell gave a pre-Super Bowl press conference where he referred to Mr. Bunny as “one of the great artists in the world.” High praise indeed.

So this morning I decided to check out a few samples of his work. It wasn’t hard to find. He has been churning out hits for almost ten years now, each of them accompanied by a slickly produced video. I chose a couple from a list of his “top ten” hits. Both songs were in Spanish. The first featured Mr. Bunny washing a pickup truck across the street from two gorgeous women sunbathing. Nice beat. The second video was in an Italian restaurant and featured what looked like Al Pacino sitting at a nearby table admiring Mr. Bunny as he ate a variety of delicious Italian dishes. Again, a nice beat but with a slow dance vibe. I must here confess that I didn’t watch through to the conclusion of either video, not because I was offended or repulsed, but rather because I was bored. It didn’t help that I didn’t understand anything because I don’t speak Spanish. It’s just that artists like Bad Bunny don’t make music videos for guys like me. This is the way it should be.

So, what to make of the alternative halftime show being planned as an alternative to Bad Bunny?

I watch the Super Bowl out of some weird sense of American obligation. It has become more of a spectacle with each passing year. The food is the best part. The commercials are always interesting. The game itself is sometimes of interest to me but increasingly less so. I’m a baseball guy. As far as the halftime shows go I usually sit and stare open-mouthed trying to figure out what’s happening. The last one I remember enjoying was the one with Bruno Mars. I will probably watch at least for a while then roll my eyes. As far as the alternative show, I probably won’t bother, not because I object to any of the performers or anything. It’s just that it feels like one more thing that separates us. Blue States, Red States. I don’t feel like I need an alternative halftime show. Why? If I have some serious objection to the Bad Bunnies of the world I can just turn down the sound, take a prolonged bathroom break and refresh my supply of nachos and pigs in a blanket. I’m not about to let any halftime show ruin the one occasion every year where I allow myself multiple beers!

Of course, there’s the chance that I might regret writing this. Maybe the Bad Bunny halftime show turns out to be a “I hate America screed”—some sort of call for violent overthrow of American Imperialism. Maybe his dancers will all be pride-flag wearing, blue haired middle aged women blowing whistles or something. Who knows? 

But I’m not planning on losing any sleep over it. Are you?