Friday, April 5, 2013

Kim il-Jong-sung-un Kim II

After four days away from the world, it’s Friday, cold and rainy, and I’m headed into the office. The world is back. But what an amazing four days it was.

I notice that while I was away, North Korean strongman, Kim Jong-un, son of Kim Jong-il, heir of eternal leader Kim il-sung has ratcheted up the rhetoric. While before he was vowing to only “settle accounts” with us, now he promises to rain down nuclear missiles on that hot-bed of Anti-North Korean activity…Austin, Texas. Great. That’s just what we need, more fuel for the Texas ego! I can hear it now, “We’re so bad-ass even the Koreeuns are scared of us! Hook-em  horns!”

Rhetoric aside, I find it hard to get worked up over threats from a country that just gave a State dinner to Dennis Rodman. How am I supposed to fear a country who releases a video of a “spontaneous demonstration” of a million of its citizens denouncing the United States, when all one million of them were spontaneously walking in perfect straight lines? And, all those Kim’s? How is one to keep up, especially since they all have the same tailor? At least Hitler had better uniforms, and that distinctive mustache.

Of course, with each new bellicose statement that flows from Kim’s mouth comes an equally ridiculous statement from some U.S. Senator’s mouth about how this all proves why we need some new 16 Trillion dollar weapons system, or how crucial it is for us to remain vigilant to threats from near and far. What it actually proves is how sand-poundingly stupid it is for 25,000 American soldiers to still be stationed in South Korea, 55 years after that war ended. South Korea is one of the richest most economically powerful nations on earth, yet they can’t afford to place their own soldiers on their own border? Since we’re still there, we become the targets of the latest Kim’s deranged rants instead of the nice South Korean government. No, the South Koreans are too busy making tons of money selling cars and refrigerators, since they don’t have to waste money defending their own borders. Come to think of it, we’re probably spending more money defending their border than we spend defending our own.