April Fools Day is simply put, the greatest day of the year. Christmas? Psshhtt! Thanksgiving, July the 4th? Puh-lease. Nothing compares to a day when you wake up and suddenly practical jokes are acceptable behavior, suddenly it is not only ok but expected to hide open cans of cat food in the filing cabinets of your colleagues. For one day of the year, I'm allowed to sabotage the copy machine by slipping random sheets of paper throughout an entire ream with big bold type declaring that BLAIRE IS AN IDIOT. Only on this blessed day am I allowed to fill storage cabinets chocked full of orange ping pong balls, or place cloves of garlic inside the mouth pieces of people's phones. It's difficult to put into words the thrill one gets from watching your buddies losing their minds trying to figure out why their computers keep typing words in Japanese. Watching them go slowly mad trying to find the source of that annoying, shrill BEEP that is coming from somewhere every three minutes. The sound of female screams from down the hall when suddenly my remote controlled mouse scampers out from under their desk is, professionally speaking, about as good as work gets.
So, I better wrap this up and get to work. I don't want to miss anything.