Thursday, July 17, 2014

Three Stupid Arguments


I would like to take this opportunity, granted to me by the First Amendment, to obliterate three ignorant arguments currently being made concerning our immigration problem on the southern border.

1.         “This is America. We are open to everyone!!”
                          Congressman John Lewis (D) Georgia

Mr. Lewis, I would like to respectably disagree with you in the most emphatic way possible. For the sake of charity, I will assume that you were merely caught up in the moment and used this line as a rhetorical device only, not intending it to be confused with an actual statement of law or fact. Surely as an elected official of some statue, you are aware of the many restrictions that we place upon anyone wishing to come to this country. In case you have forgotten, let me list just a few. The following are a short list of circumstances that would prohibit a person from entering the United States:

1.     Tuberculosis, or any other infectious disease

2.     Ties to any terrorist or criminal organization

3.     Guilty of crimes of moral turpitude ( child molestation, rape, fraud or theft)

4.     Having overstayed a previous visit to U.S.

5.     Ever worked illegally in the United States.

6.     Any outstanding international warrants.

Every sovereign nation has a duty to control the flow of people in and out of their country. For all of the beautiful optics of Lady Liberty, Ellis Island is/was a controlled entry point for immigrants, not an opened gate.


2.                               “Fences don’t work!”

                                   Practically every Democratic politician

Yes, fences don’t work, which explains why every important and powerful politician in America lives behind one. Fences most definitely do work, a fact that every dog owner in America knows, along with every convicted criminal living in a prison. The President’s Secret Service detail also knows that fences work since the White House is surrounded by a quite formidable one. The current Mayor of Los Angeles, Antonio Villarigosa just got finished installing a six foot tall security fence around his residence, becoming the first mayor in that city’s history to do so, yet it didn’t stop him from lecturing the rest of us. When discussing the present unpleasantness on our southern border, his honor proclaimed, “We don’t need to build fences, we need to build bridges.” Ok. We will if you will!


3. The fact that we want to build a fence on our southern border, while ignoring our northern border with Canada proves that the motivations of those in favor of “securing the border” are racist.


This particular insinuation is so sand-poundingly stupid it defies comprehension. Yes, of course, we are racists for ignoring those long lines of Canadian children flooding into Detroit. This is the equivalent to arguing that the best way to treat a broken leg is with a multi-vitamin. It reminds me of that old bit that Bill Cosby used to tell about the time when he was playing football for Temple University. It was the one and only game of his career that was broadcast on television. All of the team was told that during the game they were prohibited from touching “certain parts of your body.” Sure enough, in the first period Bill gets kicked directly in the family jewels. When the trainer runs out he reminds him not to touch “certain parts.” So Bill grabs his head! To make it look convincing, the trainer bandaged his head!!

The reason nobody is talking about a fence up north is because nobody wants to bandage the nation’s head, when we are being repeatedly kicked in the you know where down south.

Thank you for your time. I feel so much better now!