Saturday, June 7, 2014

Wedding Planning Part VII


Months of preparation, weeks of worry, days of scrutinizing and agonizing over every detail, every possible contingency, and finally the day we have all been dreading has arrived. At this point there’s nothing left to do but take a deep breath and charge into the breach. Are these quotations from a soldier’s journal the morning of D-Day? Nope. Today we have our last meeting with…the caterer.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Pam has crunched the numbers with relentless efficiency. But at some point final decisions have to be made and a check cut. Today is that day, and afterwards there will be no turning back. I mean once you pick the filet and chicken marsala entrees you can’t wake up in the middle of the night next week and suddenly decide that the shrimp and grits with Virginia ham might have been a better play!

But if all we had to worry about was picking an entrée this would be a walk in the park. No, there’s also the prickly debate over “crudités vs. butler passed.” Now, I don’t have to tell you what a thorny issue that can be. Actually…I probably do since before the advent of Pinterest, nobody knew what the heck a “butler passed” was! I see the term “butler passed” in Pam’s notes and I’m thinking, “…may he rest in peace and all, but why is that my problem?? Are there no other butler’s available in the city of Richmond for that weekend??”

Then there’s the question of the champagne toast, the optional “coffee bar” and the baffling omission of sweet tea from the beverage queue. They list lemonade and water only. Excuse me, but I’m pretty sure that this wedding isn’t taking place in upstate New York. This is Virginia people! It will be the middle of July and we’re going to be outside. If we don’t offer iced, sweet tea with lemon, we’re going to have a riot on our hands. If we have to cut cost somewhere, we can always scratch the Dom Perignon and go with the Cold Duck, but I'm drawing the line at sweet tea.

Last night my wife was sitting on the sofa at her laptop, with her three ring wedding planning binder opened and copious notes littered all over the room. She looks up at me and asks, “Do you think there is any way that you can come with Kaitlin and me to the caterer’s meeting tomorrow? She batted her eye lashes, her bottom lip quivered ever so faintly and I found myself saying, “Sure.”

So, I will come along to Celebrations on the Reservoir today to meet the caterer and hash out the great crudités vs. butler passed debate with my girls. I will try my best not to say anything snarky or embarrassing. When asked my opinion I will offer it succinctly and without embellishment, “I agree! Oh, and pass along my condolences to that butler’s family.”