Saturday, January 11, 2014

Wedding Planning: Part III


My wife and daughter just left the house giggling merrily, and disappeared down the street, cutting through the misty fog of this miserable day. What, you might ask could they possibly be so giddy about? Today, they are on the hunt for…wait for it…bridesmaid’s dresses!

Yes, just yesterday Pam produced a color swatch for my consideration. She held it up to the lamp light in the breakfast nook and began extolling the virtues of the rich, teal color and how it so perfectly complimented a throw pillow on Kaitlin’s sofa. I had just walked in the house from a workout at AMFAM and as is my unfortunate habit, had missed the first sentence of this exchange, resulting in the mistaken conclusion that Pam was planning on painting the walls of the kitchen this dark, foreboding color.

“NO, silly!” she explained. “This is the color of the bridesmaid’s dresses. Come on honey, keep up!”

So, off they go today in search for wedding finery. I sense just a hint of cockiness in them. Fresh off of last week’s wedding dress triumph; I fear that they may be under the mistaken impression that they have this business well in hand. I know better. When it comes to all things nuptial, I am a pessimist. At each and every turn I expect glitches, missteps, bitter disappointments, and escalating, out of control costs. I have steeled myself for these unhappy outcomes and have determined that no matter how bad it gets, I will be calm and collected. Above all else, I intend to smile and be of good cheer. I am determined not to pull a George Banks. I will not be reduced to the confines of a jail cell because of hot dog bun type meltdown. See, George’s problem was that he actually thought that it was possible for everything to work out well and at a reasonable price. Well, I’m not falling for that delusion. I am fully prepared for the financial and emotional implosion to come and will face it with hearty good cheer!

So far the problem seems to be that I have done all this steeling and girding up of loins…for nothing! They picked the venue with a minimum of angst and within a reasonable range of our budget. Then the photographer was booked along with the DJ, again with nary a tear. Next thing I know they’re out there picking out a wedding dress in one trip to David’s Bridal. It would be very tempting to let my guard down a bit. Things are going quite well. It’s actually quite eerie.

But, I know full well that there are many minefields ahead, what with a wedding cake to order and flowers to buy. I’ve watched enough cooking shows to know how volatile bakers and chefs can be, and I don’t even want to think about dealing with the eccentricities inherent in the personality of your average florist. It could still get very ugly, very quickly.

But, for the time being, all is well here at Dunnevant Wedding Central.